Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Okay for those of you that think I talk about myself too much in the first, second and third person too bad I am using this blog as a voyage of self discovery and I think I just discovered something about myself

at work, in groups of men I am an alpha male. I silently but surely control things. People do what I say when I say it and they do it willingly to please me. Unfortunately its always in groups of men. Before you ask I am not gay, infact I find men completely repugnant, what I mean is that I work construction and apart from the occasional customer I deal almost exclusively with men. But I dominate them with out ever trying, its just part of my personality, I am an alpha male. Leader of the pack not a follower, able to control and dominate with out even understanding why. I always thought it was just my stubbornness but today I spent in the company of other alpha males of the construction business and still I dominated them, although of course more subtly, more interpersonal.

now you're asking is this all brag and fat headed shite? No because I also was considering my relationship with the female of my species. I like strong women, smart women, real women! I have known for quite a while I had a very strong dominating personality and I see now that I don't play alpha male with women. I have intentionaly muted my personality to see if the ladies I like have the equal personality to fill the void. Women want the alpha male and by not acting like one around them I have completely destroyed all chances I had with them. Add to that a certain shyness and I think in my life to most women, other than my secretaries, I appear to be a beta male, a second stringer, a less desirable model.

to those women, very few women, I have shown the alpha male work side of my personality my size has never been a problem. Those that see my beta male muted personality added to my shyness has proven to be a complete turn off.

you can say what you want but my full bore personality, but its too much for most people, but my beta personality for women is too little. That's why the Irish chick and I get on so well, she has seen both sides but she knows alpha is dominant.

women deny it all you want but your yen for the alpha male is biological and unstoppable

of course as always I might be full of shite
razors back

2 Comments:

Blogger Christine said...

I wouldn't deny THAT for a second. What I will say, in my own experience, please men, don't show me that wimpy other side shit. I don't want to see it or know about it. Sensitivity is for my girlfriends. Keep that wimpy sensitive side to yourself and mow my freakin lawn. thankyouverymuch

6:26 AM  
Blogger razorbeck said...

lol I never said I was wimpy just that I dont allow my over powering personality out. I have only realized in the last few years that I even have one but its like a charging rhino once let loose its impossible to stop and since I love women with strong personalities I just leave room for them to assert their own lol

6:45 AM  

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